Mela Kamin – What I Say in between Songs

A friend’s tweet got me thinking about doors, locked doors, closed doors and slammed doors.
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You see, sometimes as parents, we’d like our kids to leave our presence and go somewhere else – usually that “somewhere” is their own room. For me, this is doubly exhausting because not only do my kids not move very quickly when I speak, talk louder and even shout, they hardly ever make it all the way up the stairs and into their rooms.
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On the odd occasion they actually either willingly go to their rooms or are taken there (yes, we have actually carried our children to their rooms to make the point), there is often whining, yelling and yes, some slamming doors.
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This audible representation of adding insult to injury really gets on my nerves. As if their outburst or misbehavior wasn’t enough – they now have to go and show (very loudly) their utter disgust with this form of discipline – banishment from the family for a little while.
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The slamming doors finally got to me so much that I told my husband the next time it happened, I wanted him to remove their doors . . . no doors, no slamming. The next time the doors were slammed, he removed them and I was very pleased by my brilliance. Now, of course – they are still off and there’s no slamming because there is no door. But, there’s still whining, complaining, yelling, rolling eyes and general grumpiness. That will have to be dealt with in other ways. Most of the time, it’s prayer.
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Now, I’d like to tell you that I pray wholeheartedly that I’ll have more patience and be more tolerant of their idiosyncrasies; that I’ll soften to their spirited ways and mother them with a generous, grace-filled heart. That’s not always the case. Usually, I’m praying in exasperation for God to change them.
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But, then I remember all the ways in which I behave like a toddler or disobedient adolescent when saying “No” to God. I slam the door of my heart and whine and complain about having to do this or that, not getting to do this or that, or choosing apathy over action. I don’t go where He asks me to and I often question His plans for me.
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The doors we use to keep God out of a certain area of our life, sometimes need to be removed. We need to expose ourselves to God – to show him just how much we are in need of grace.
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We remove the doors by repenting. We seek Him and His forgiveness. And, He takes us back – just. like. that.
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If we keep slamming the door on His love, grace and forgiveness, I pray He’ll go ahead and remove those imaginary doors through His power and Holy Spirit, so He may come rescue us anytime we feel banished from His family.